This is from one of our members.
Meditating on Ash
In our meditation we were asked to consider ash since we have been working with elements of fire, my first reaction was uhh? What will come up, meditating on ash. It was much more enlightening than I thought it would be. I meditated and what came up was words that described ash. Neutral, dead, cremation, powder, grey. Then a memory came up, which was painful and shocking. I had a friend who lost his life a few years ago in an accident involving very high voltage wires, I heard that all that was left of this man was carbon residue. I had written a poem about him extolling his swashbuckling ways and his more than nine lives for his memorial but though I was sad, I hadn’t grieved. As I was spreading ash on a glued background, I saw in my mind a silhouette of a human form curled in a foetal position. It was in that moment that I grieved my loss. Beautiful powerful and totally unexpected. It caused me to be reflective all weekend and another ash related thought came up. Which I need to preface: I was drawn to paint a Native American Chief back in the summer and decided to paint a series. One night as I was watching TV the painting appeared to morph, as I watched I saw Indian chiefs from history appearing and disappearing to be replaced with another. Normally I would discount the “vision” but I decided that it happened for a reason, the visual memory has stayed with me, which led me to the other ash experience, which had to do with the sacred burial grounds on which Native Americans are cremated on a funeral pyre. I suddenly realized that the ancestors were lying in layer upon layer of ash that created the history of the people, the significance for me was very powerful and I know that it will inform my paintings of Native peoples as I move forward.
I am finding our Thursday meditation in the liminal field another way to experience life outside the literal and I’m choosing to experience that whenever I can. My perceptions based on my beliefs are slowly being transformed.
I am so thankful for Pamela’s mentorship into this realm and grateful to be in this amazing group.